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Would you rather know the lyrics to "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall"? Those we can provide. Want to see how computer programmers have simplified the song's repetitive message? Cheers. Wish you had a nonalcoholic version for the kiddies? At your service. However when it comes to determining the song's true history, we can only surmise it's an American version of "Ten Green Bottles," a 19th-century English children's song -- of which there are a few explanations and variations. We thought we'd arrived at the bottom of this perplexing question upon reading of a discovery that dates the earliest known version of this demanding ditty. But the account of the 14th-century version of "Ten Green Bottles" turned out to be an April Fools' can of worms. And as for "99 Bottles" being a secret code for the the Skull and Bones society, we think that writer has had one too many.
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